dogs.

so dogs have been on my brain a lot lately, namely because i'm consumed with a fiery hatred of my neighbor's dogs, which bark incessantly. (remember this? yes, well they still exist. and i still hate them.)

also, i've been taking care of my sister's dogs while she's out of town. she has two big ones, their breed escapes me, but they're large enough to scratch the living daylights out of my, ahem, future baby feeders when they jump on me. and then she has one little one, that might actually be capable of levitation. she got so excited to see me that she peed on me. which was cool.

not.

here's the thing. i love the idea of having a dog. in my fantasy, i have this great dog that i take on walks and play fetch with, and it lays its head in my lap as i read, and eats robbers when they try to steal my stuff. but this said dog wouldn't smell (i'm sorry, regardless of how recently you've washed a dog, it still smells like a dog. a clean dog, yes, but still a dog), wouldn't jump on me, wouldn't bark inconveniently, wouldn't pee on me/my floor, and wouldn't lick or slobber on me. the problem is, this dog does not exist, so i would be left with...this: