welcome to my brain.

so recently i've had some pretty strange dreams. last week, i dreamt (why is mozilla spellcheck telling me that's not a word? i feel like people say this.) that i was being held at swordpoint by captain hook (dustin hoffman version, circa 1991), who wanted my grandmother's wedding ring. because i neither wanted to die, nor give up my grandma's wedding ring, i devised a plan.

me: "what if...i keep the ring...but...i agree to marry you?"

hook studies me. "deal."


so that was weird. but last night takes the cake. i was in a post-apocalyptic world with my parents, running from zombies. we were in the gym of the church building i went to in missouri, hiding underneath a table in the middle of the room. we moved out from under the table to search for a safe closet to hide in. luckily for us, we knew a way to ward off zombies--oust spray.so i start dousing our trail with this spray, and we make the closet all cozy-like. i open the door to get the door frame, and bam. i slammed the door and prayed the oust spray would hold up.

then, i am abruptly awoken by FIREWORKS EXPLODING RIGHT OUTSIDE MY WINDOW. to say that i thought i was going to DIE would be an understatement. i thought there was a zombie outside my window. i thought my brains were going to get eaten.