i have bad luck with spiders.

let's talk about last thursday.
*disclaimer: there are some pictures of me on a toilet. you have been warned.

then, out of the corner of my eye, appears:

and then i:

this spider was huge. way too big to squish with a shoe, because then i would feel it crunch and smush. and i can't handle that. so i went for the next most effective alternative. scrubbing bubbles. 

after using about half the can on the demon and watching him curl up and die, i felt secure enough to do my hair in the bathroom. but i didn't want to touch it (the spider, not my hair), so i left it on the window sill because i also wanted to show grace when she got home, because fear must be shared. 

then i left, spider still curled up and not moving on the window sill. fast forward to a few hours later. grace and i come home. me: "grace come see the giant mutant i killed in our bathroom!" grace: "...iii don't..."

it.

was. 

gone.

after a frantic and scary search in the bathroom to see where it had gone, we found nothing. but i really had to pee. but i was really scared. but i still had to go. so i did. 

i don't think i've ever put my pants back as quickly in my entire life. obviously i made grace kill it the second time around. 

in case you missed this, here is some background on other horrifying spider experiences.